Today, millions of black fathers will have the rare treat of celebrating two milestones: fatherhood and freedom.
This Father’s Day, which happens to fall on Juneteenth — the commemoration of the end of slavery in the U.S., we celebrate our freedom and reflect on how far we have come and how much more we still need to go. We will also be enjoying the day of coloring fathers that are active in their children's life for being a provider, protector and having a positive and profound impact that will shape their very being.
I have asked several active fathers for tips in raising their children and here is what they had to say:
Must have unconditional love. It is not all about you anymore, but about them, and your job is to make the world a better place for them.
Do not expect a trophy for being a good father. It is not an accomplishment, it is an expectation.
Developing patience will help you realize that your children are mirrors into your soul and through them you can grow.
Respect the mother of your children because that sets the expectation they will have from the men in their lives.
Sacrifice is important, as it demands what one is willing to give up for what they expect in return; in this case, having kids do well in their own life.
Spend more time with your children. Big things and small matter to them solely because of your presence. You will remember going with them to the World Series or a trip to Hawaii. They will remember being picked up regularly from school or time that you set aside each week just to spend with them. And special moments and memories will more often flow from these.
Teaching the history, pride, and perseverance of people from whom they are descended will have a profound and positive impact on your children. That positive set of role models helps children not only endure, but flourish in our society.
Girls get much of their self-esteem from their fathers, and how you love and respect your wife will shape their expectations of what a healthy and loving relationship looks like.
Time is the most precious commodity in life, and time with your children is the most valuable of all.
Show up. Listen up. Love up.
